All the site gave me was some crap about how I should use a multi-user installation, which didn't help because I already do. Google turned up one other person in Germany having the same problem on a Mac, and nobody on the appletalk forums said anything besides "the problem should resolve itself".There was a problem initializing Opera Mail.
Couldn't initialize backends
Initializing Account5 failed
AccountManager Init failed
Engine Init() failed
Seriously, what the hell? "Opera Mail" is misleading: it includes Opera IRC and Usenet as well (I use georgia tech webmail anyway). I may as well just download xChat and some other newsreader (?) and switch back to Firefox if this keeps up. (Or Cygwin, irssi, pan, and midori).
Also, in case you're wondering where I've been on IRC...well, yeah.