*sigh*
This comic smacks of someone not particularly serious about making comics. Of course, that's not helpful, and I try to be helpful so here goes.
The Bad:
-The only joke more overused than this one is the one where the ninja jumps into a death trap for an obviously inaccessible gold piece. I don't mind recycling jokes, especially for learner comic writers, but there has to be something new added to it, and for you there was nothing.
-While you made this as a joke, you made
this for real. I find this a little ironic. I could go on about your maps, but I'll try and stay focused on the comic.
-I get it
now, but a one-panel comic needs to have *bam* to be good. See "The Ugly" for more details
-Your comic has some aesthetic issues.
The Good:
-Well, he is... standing on the floor! This sort of sounds like a cop-out, but having characters not on the ground (especially when a ground is explicitly drawn) is the single biggest comic turn-off IMO.
The Ugly:
-Er... it's not a floor... this took me a while. This comment was originally going to say: where did the rockets come from, but then I got that, but it brings up an even bigger issue:
-That pose suggests he has not moved, and yet he is clearly standing in mid-air, and the rockets have already started. He really should have been in the falling pose, which wouldn't have been hard since you clearly used a screenshot+MSPaint, and not
NPoser (the best program _ever_ for N comics)
-Placing a caption in the frame is gross, the font is bad (but the best you can do with paint), and the color... well, actually, the color isn't terrible, but it clashed horribly with the background, not helped by the fact that it's not centered.
The Future: If you do plan to continue, keep these in mind
-If you want a more complex joke, you need a multi-panel comic. I'm not saying don't do single panels, I'm just saying to read them from an outside perspective.
-After writing it, ask yourself: Does this convey the message I want? The message is usually humor, but not always (see The Real N for a good example of various messages)
-Try Inkscape or GIMP for a free image editor, and download fonts until you find something you like. When it comes to fonts, the rule is: Don't settle. It is extremely likely someone has made your exact font.
See what you can do with the comic. Honestly, if you really want to do this, I really want to see it.
Turiski
